Jazz Professional               

Audience flagging? Need a good one to pep things up?
Some of the following are famous, others not so famous,
but RON RUBIN, pianist and bassist, calls them all

TUNERISMS

They Tried to Sell Us Egg Foo Yung They Tried to Tell Us We 're Too Young
I 'm a Noel Coward Fan from the Rio Grande I'm an Old Cowhand from the Rio Grande
(It's very clear) Your Mother's Here to Stay Love Is Here to Stay
Days of Wine and Cirrhosis Days of Wine and Roses
Between the Devil and the E.E.C. Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea
I Only Advise a Few I Only have Eyes for You
What Are You Doing Molesting My Wife What Are You Doing the Rest of your Life
When Your Liver Has Gone When Your Lover Has Gone
Massenet's Allergy Massenet's Elegy
When Sonny Blew Getz When Sunny Gets Blue
A Bisexual Made for Two A Bicycle Made for Two
Good Morning, Headache Good Morning, Heartache
Suffocated Lady Sophisticated Lady
There's a Blue Rinse Round My Head, Virginia There's a Blue Ridge Round My Heart, Virginia
I'm Putting All My Basques in One Exit I'm Putting All My Eggs in One Basket
Adjust My Bill He's Just My Bill
Veal Meat Again! We'll Meet Again
Baby, De Gaulle's Outside Baby, It's Cold Outside
A Wino that You Know I Know that You Know
Zing Went the Strings of my Bass Zing Went the Strings of my Heart
The Folks Who Live on the Dole The Folks Who Live on the Hill
I'll Syringe Your Ear I Surrender, Dear
I Hear Muzak I Hear Music
Fry Me Some Liver Cry Me a River
Met a Gal in Pimlico Gal in Calico
You Came a Long Way from St Pancras You Came a Long Way from St Louis
Do You Know What it Means to Miss Milton Keynes Do You Know What it Means to Miss New Orleans
Bike Up The Strand Strike Up The Band
(Don't Love You 'Cos) Your Feature's Too Big Your Feet's Too Big
I Lost My Car in an Avalanche I Left My Heart in Avalon
I'm In Love With a Wonderful Gay I'm In Love With a Wonderful Guy
You Stepped out of a Drain You Stepped out of a Dream
I Fall About Too Easily I Fall in Love Too Easily
I Wonder Who's Kissinger Now? I Wonder Who's Kissing Her Now
Ghouls Rush In Fools Rush in
Slap That Bass Player! Slap That Bass
Chompin' At The Saveloy Stompin' At The Savoy
Two Sloppy People Two Sleepy People
I'll Buy a Round I'll Be Around
Don't Buy a Round Much Any More Don't Get Around Much Any More
I Get Along Without You H. G. Wells I Get Along Without You Very Well
I'm a Drummer - Aren 't We All? I'm a Dreamer, Aren't We All
I'm An Old Fascist I'm Oldfashioned
Don't Put Your Worthington On the Stage, Mrs Porter Don't Put Your Daughter On the Stage, Mrs Worthington
Stranglers in the Night Strangers in the Night
Basingstoke Blues Basin Street Blues
Big Nose from Winnetka Big Noise from Winnetka
I'm Delighted to see the Gin I'm Beginning to see the Light
Drop Me Off in Harlesden Drop Me Off in Harlem
 I've Got A Right to Sink the Booze I Gotta Right to Sing the Blues
Vindaloo of the Night When the Blue of the Night
You Took a Bandage off Me You Took Advantage of Me
I Got Rid o' Them I Got Rhythm
Every Baby Loves My Body Everybody Loves my Baby
What! Is This Thing Called Love?! What Is This Thing Called Love
I've a Singing in the Brain I'm Singing in the Rain
You Go To Minehead You Go To My Head
I like a Nice J & B in The Morning I Like A Nice  Cup of Tea in the Morning 
I Wish You Could See Me and My Sister Skate I Wish I Could Shimmy Like My Sister Kate
Some Day My Prints Will Come Some Day My Prince Will Come
I'm Gettin' Cement All Over You
anon
I'm Gettin' Sentimental Over You
In my suite, Little Al is glued down
anon
In my Sweet Little Alice Blue Gown